I like noodles, and I like rice. And most of the time here in Tokyo, that’s what I eat. But I did grow up in the States, and I grew up eating a lot of burgers—diner burgers, fast-food burgers, gourmet burgers, backyard burgers, and middle-of-the-night burgers.
I still get the itch for a hamburger po’boy, that most underappreciated iteration of the Louisiana staple. Hamburger purists might be offended that it is on a soft loaf of New Orleans French instead of a bun, but after eating through 14 linear inches of double-stacked beef and cheese (which is its usual construction), they probably won’t be able to complain about much. Actually, they probably won’t be able to do anything at all. In Louisiana, the phrase blacked out can refer to a lot more than alcohol consumption.
Sadly, there are no hamburger po’boys in the city of Tokyo (plenty of blacked-out drunks though). Burger behemoths do exist however. The fast-food chain Lotteria runs a somewhat regular promotion where you can get a burger stacked with patties running into the double digits: debasing ourselves with overconsumption is something of a pastime here. For more discerning masochists, there are better options, all of which can make you uncomfortably full without making you feel like you committed a sin against God and man.